Run # 621 (Arundhati Bungalow)

 

Bombay Hash House Harriers – Run No. 621

Arundhati Bungalow, Sanjay Gandhi National Park

If you weren’t there, you missed a Sunday morning that smelled less like fresh forest air and more like sweaty hashers and questionable beer breath. Run No. 621 kicked off from the charming Arundhati Bungalow, located just a “I can smell your fart” distance from the infamous Sanjay Gandhi National Park—and trust me, some hashers took that measurement literally.

🦌 The Trail: Wildlife Meets Wild Hashers

• A 7+ km trail wound through the park, where spotted deer looked at us like, “Really? You call that running?”

• Monkeys swung overhead, probably judging our beer bellies and wondering why humans wear shoes they later drink from.

• The park itself has leveled up since vehicles were banned—no honking, no exhaust fumes, just the occasional hasher honking into the bushes.

🍺 Post-Trail Shenanigans: Beer, Ice, and Bad Decisions

The Circle was where the real cardio happened—lifting beers and dodging insults:

• Cunt Cheryl and Dickless Alistair were praised for setting a trail so good even the monkeys clapped.

• Jack-of was iced for hosting us at his lovely bungalow, which now smells faintly of sweat, beer, and regret.

• Premature Ejaculation and FUBAR christened their new shoes the traditional way—by drinking beer out of them. First the wrong shoe, then the left shoe. Somewhere, Nike is crying.

• Visiting hashers Dr. Kanchan (Pune Hash) and Airy Weiner, also known as Banana Split, were next on the ice, proving that humiliation is the universal language of hashing.

• The grand finale? Burger King burgers, because nothing says “athlete” like chasing deer for 7 km and then inhaling a Whopper.

🎄 What’s Next?

Mark your calendars: 21st December, somewhere in Bandra. Christmas in Bandra is basically Santa swapping his sleigh for a rickshaw and handing out beers instead of gifts. A must-attend.

Yipika Yay On On!

Run 591 | Grant Road

 One of the most liked places for us hashers to run from within the city is Late Mr. Irani's (RIP) lovely terrace in Grant Road. 

And we were glad to be here after so long. 

So, on a crisp and hot Sunday morning, hashers gathered outside the gate of the building which happens to be BANG opposite the Grant Road Railway Station. While were shuffling the crates from the car to the terrace, a cabbie was heard cursing. The words he used got instantly graved in our minds and Wackopedia accepted the cabbie as a guru... "Lund ke Balgam"

The hot topic of discussion was also the very fancy way, this run was marked. There was no tape, no chalk, no map; this beauty was marked with a riddle, actually, a few riddles put together. And the riddles were made up of Bollywood songs. 

The trail was as follows:

na na karte pyaar tumhi se kar baithe - 

apni azaadi ko hum hargiz mitaa sakte nahin - 

kabhi warden road kabhi ...... .... - 

hum bewafaa hargiz na thé (par hum 'hotel 😜' book karna saké) - 

पाद aa rahi hai, mujhe पाद aa rahi hai - 

hai huku hai huku hai hai - 

left lo aur dekho baarish (nahin) ho rahi hai - 

jaggu dada ka adda aaya, dhoop mein gaand fatt gaya  - 

yahan pe jayenge lekin bhel nahin khayenge - 

aur left mein naahi pav bhaji khayenge - 

Vihar coffee House (yeh bc jagah pe koi film ne dhyaan nahin diya, BC)! - 

left at z grade bhojpuri movies ka purana thikana - 

iss theatre ke aas paas mein sirf gay aur fairies milenge - 

take left to arrive at station pin code 007!

So, the next time you are in town and are supremely bored and want to walk, just decode this and you'll be good to go. 

We crossed quite a few landmark spots and we also crossed the building which was gifted to the right hand of Mr. Mukesh Ambani. If I was given a property this big, I'd retire. 

The View point was shut so we stood next to it for a group picture. The sun was right on top but our spirits were high. Either that or the circuits in our heads had burnt off. Either way, good pic eh!?

Back at the venue, the fans were turned on and hashers chilled on comfy chairs and chilled Kingfisher while it lasted. 

Issued in public interest:

When I say chilled Kingfisher while it lasted, I meant that we served the last batch of Kingfisher. We shall now be sipping on the cool refreshment that London Pilsner brings with it. 

Yeah, Bombay Hash has moved to London Pilsner and a certain few hashers couldn't be more happier with the welcome change. Thank you Kingfisher for your support all these years. 

So, after Osamas snacks were devoured and FUBARs salary was munched up, Bonsai announced the circle and every one stood around 6 lil blocks of ice that were melting away fast. 

Shivaji was iced for the wonderfully riddled run. Wreckless, Cyrus, Hand Cock, Ninja and Leaky Faucet accompanied him with a wow to hares runs in the future. 

Next on the ice was Wreckless and Hand Cock, the birthday boys of May. 

Fartashaty decided to wear new shoes to the run. We loved the shoes as much as he loved drinking donated beer from the shoe. 

Fartashaty was also put on the ice for organizing the lovely venue for us to run from. We all raised our cans and paid our respects to Mr. Irani. 

I guess London Pilsner has already started working its magic on the hashers. By the time we were done with the anthem, Cyrus got very patriotic and motivated and offered a venue for the June run and also commited to hare the said run. Yippee!

Note: The June run is going to be a city run! 

With the assumption of a monsoony June run, hashers split, with enough time to watch the IPL finals which actually, eventually, ended on Tuesday.

ON ON!

PS: Osama is up for grabs! Anyone interested!?

Run # 590 | 3 gunna lagaan maaf

 13 men; 13 notorious men gathered outside Shivaji Park Gymkhana on a Sunday morning. What followed was an absolutely... well... unmarked run through the streets of Dadar and Matunga. 

Run # 590 was an all-out, "Why shouldn't boys have all the fun" run. Yes, a 100% guy run (unplanned) as the ladies decided to puss out of this one. 

Wackopedia and Shivaji have finally spent enough time with FUBAR to fuck this one up, BIG TIME! But it was fucked up in a very good way. 

The run flagged off outside the Gymkhana. Neither Wackopedia nor Shivaji, who also happens to be the Hare Raiser, spoke of markings. They nicely wrapped the run with words we couldn't make out and suddenly said ON ON! to disperse us. 

BUT, before all that happened; Osama decided to show up for this one with a car full of goodness from a little place in heaven known as Candies. Yup, Osama laid a 7-course styled breakfast in front of us with eatables ranging from Chutney/ Cheese/ Chicken sandwiches to puffs and samosas and the world-famous Bandra; potato chips.  

This was followed by the grand entrance of Chediya Chutney which guaranteed a round of yummy-tasty, home-made chutney sandwiches. 

All this put us in a really good mood to wonder or worry about the markings; of which there were none. 

That aside, the trail took us through the hustle and bustle of Dadar and Matunga and got all of us back to the Gymkhana safe and sound. 

Once back, we pumped another round of snacks with the addition of the Chutney Sandwiches and headed to the roof of the Gymkhana for some cold beers and conversations. 

ON ON!

Run # 589 Rajodi Beach

The run flags off on the biteach

A run on the beach was the best way to follow up a run in the woods. With that in mind, we gathered across the street from Rajodi Beach in Virar (which could also be accessed from Nalasopara and Vasai). 
Buttler aka Lenny made some fabulous arrangements for the evening. 

This also marked the return of Racing Snake(Eugene) and Buttler(Lenny) and Ashwin. These creatures resurfaced after a long time. 

Hares, Buttler and Shivaji laid a craze of a trail. We started off with a long stretch on the beach and then entered the bylanes of Virar. 

We crossed flea markets, shopping streets, beers shops (some hashers even indulge in roadside gulping), vast fields, a professional cricket tournament LIVE, houses with fish being dried on a bedsheet on the road, some more beer shops (hashers indulged again). 

The hares even squeezed in a snack break at a point on the run. Piping hot vada pavs were served. And, guess what, there was a beer shop right next to the stall (so some hashers indulged in a gulp, AGAIN). 

Shivaji even indulged in some shopping at the open flea market on the trail.

Veggie cleaning: Hares had organized for the hashers to take the opportunity and live locally. They got some of us to clean veggies with the local farmers. In exchange for cleaning a lot, the hashers were awarded a peg of their local alcohol. 

Tadi shots: There was also a stop where hashers got to swig a shot of desi daru. That got the feet wobbly. 

After the run, things at the venue were picking up merrily. As the last hashers i.e. Bicep Bubbly, Clit-ohhh-patra, and FUBAR entered the venue, they could hear Bonsai hurling abuses L, R, and C. True to her image, they could only hear her cursing. It was also noteworthy when a hasher questioned why the 3 last comers were so late in spite of taking a shortcut? The topic was conveniently diverted by the smart and savvy short cutters. 

Circle:

Hares were applauded for the brilliantly laid trail. The markings were a little scarce but the experience of the run overall was fantastic. Shivaji and Lenny drank heartily from their piss-pots for a gobtastic trail.

Bicep Bubbly, FUBAR, and Clit-oh-patra were iced for having too many beers and too much fun on the run. They shortcutted to get extra time on the beach and even managed time on the ice and beers from the pot for the same. 

The 1st 2 got off the ice while the latter was joined by Cumsulkcunt on the ice. Clit had an announcement to make... "She said yes", it was. There was an outburst of emotions and congratulations followed. 

Wackopedia, Running Snake, and Bonsai warmed the slab next. Running Snake pulled out a trophy with Bonsai's name on it. He announced that he was done holding on to it for so many years and finally wanted to hand it over to Bonsai. Another round of nostalgic emotions took over the hashers for all of 14 seconds, I guess. 

Buttler took center stage by providing us a fantastic venue and arrangements for a lovely run. 

As if we hadn't had enough yet, out came piping hot and yummy-tasty fish and chicken starters for the gang. They were gulped down with burning throats; they were that tasty-yummy. A finger ful of vegetarians stoop on the side and watched. Then it was their turn as they got some slurpy-yummy sabzi, roti, and dal. 

With a belly full of beer and yummy food and a mind, fully refreshed with all the beach vibes, we headed back home. ON ON!

Run # 588 Arundhati, SGNP

 "वही बंगला जहां जमीन पर बर्फ रखी हो और लोग उस पर बैठते हों?", said the ice vendor upon FUBAR ordering the ice. "आप सब बरसों बाद आए हैं", he said as he confirmed that the ice block would reach Arundhati on time for the circle. 

The Arundhati gang for Run # 588

On Sunday morning, the neighborhood in Krishna Nagar, Borivali (East), woke up to a nostalgic chatter outside Arundhati Bungalow. Screams of On On!, where to park the car? who will eat Vada pav, weird names being called out did the rounds! 

Amey 'Jack of', the host, and a newly titled father, was overwhelmed already by seeing hashers after ages.

Bicep Bubbly, one of the 2 hares, arrived fashionably late and tried to blame his wife for the same. One look from Deepti and he had his tail between his legs. 

 

The unmarked trail, finally announced by FUBAR, flagged off at 10:30ish and took the hashers for a lovely walk inside Sanjay Gandhi National Park, a dense jungle within the city. Once again, we didn't manage to lose any hasher on the trail or in the jaws of a wild cat (DAMMIT). After roughly 90 mins of pure Mowgly vibes, the hashers returned to Arundhati for some down-downs.  

Arundhati has always been a place where hashers get a little enchanted. The conversations are more, the masti is more and the vibe is a little high. 

Circle:

FUBAR and Bicep Bubbly were iced for laying a fantastic trail without any markings. A superb 10/10 for the run, purely cos of the environment in which it was held. 

Virgin, Dipti, and Returnees, Bicep Bubbly, Shreyashi, Horny Yeti, and On a Loop were iced and welcomed and welcomed back to Bombay Hash

The entire gang who made it to InterHash in Goa was next on the ice. 

Clit-Oh-Patra was iced for showing true Hashing spirit and traveling almost 200 km just to attend the run.

'Jack Of' was iced for being a wonderful host and spoiling us with this quaint and lovely bungalow. Bonsai and Shinging curiously discussed his ass in the background.

After all the fun, yummy biryani did the job of keeping our tummy happy. 

Some headed off to their domes while some headed off to Doolally for more beers. 

On On!

Next Run:

26th March 2023... details to be out soon! 

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Run # 587 God knows where

We decided to start 2023 with the city run. And as dazed and confused, 1 half of the hare was, it all became chaotic right off the start. 

Yes, FUBAR was one half of the duo who were going to hare. See that is where it already becomes interesting. Now, it becomes even more interesting because the second hare was the Vada Pav-loving, curse inventing, Wackopedia. See where we are going?

The Run (as announced)- It was announced that the run would start from the gate of Inorbit Mall and finish at Malad Social. Sounds super simple, innit? 

The Haring procedure- The hares would set a trail, and mark it with red tape or flour or chalk, or limestone. 

Fubar set off on Saturday morning to mark a rough trail, halfway into his journey, he realized he'd forgotten to carry the damn tape. So he just walked the trail and got it on Strava. 

In the evening, he and Wackopedica set off once again, this time with the red tape. They marked the first 3 km of the 6kms trail and then stopped. 

They stopped at a local watering hole known as Panchmukhi.  It was a quarter joint. Over the next 6 hours, they got tipsy and decided that this was a better spot than Malad Socials and so the down-downs should be done here. There was also a surprise for all those attending the run. 

The actual run- On D-Day, the hashers gathered at the meeting point. Wreckless provided entertainment by wearing his hash tee, front side back. He did do a small but erotic skin show while attempting to correct the wardrobe malfunction on the street. 

Soon after the erotic session, the fun was flagged off. 

The surprise- The hashers were immediately ushered to the newly inaugurated Metro Line and the run began with a ride in the Metro. Post the ride, the trail took them to the lovely backroad of Malad Mindspace, onto the Link Road, through Sunder Nagar, the narrow streets of Somvari Bazaar, Liberty Garden, and back to the Link Road; finally ending the trail at the 'discovered yesterday', Panchmukhi Bar and Restaurant. 

At the bar, beer and Old Monk started pouring from the glasses down our throats. Conversations started pouring from our mouths in the environment. A little laugh here, a loud curse there, giggles and smoke circles in the air, the hashers got merry. 

We were also joined by the cult builder, Cum-sulk-cunt for the down-downs. Yeah, she's made it a habit to ensure that she comes to Bombay for all our runs. Then she'd sleep till late, miss the run and attend the down-down sesh. Damn good trick, lady!

We also got a surprise visit from 'No Conditions Apply' who came to Bombay after spending a day at the Nash Hash in Bengaluru. 

And so, after a lovely morning of running a half-marked but beautiful trail set by the hares, down-downs at a local watering hole, and some memories made, some hashers called it a day, and some continued with their drinks. 

Until the next run, ON ON!