There is
something about “Osama”. The bugger somehow manages to hog the limelight no
matter where he goes. Take for instance the ides of Feb. – Mumbai Marathon.
This semi-aped creature overshadowed the presence of the country’s who’s who to grab the media’s attention.
Forget page 3, the sonofagun was featured on page 1 in the ToI (all India
Over to the
leeward corner of the Oberoi’s, the hash started the year with a bang with a
turnout of over 70 hashers. The “Hash Cash” was busier than the
busiest busy bee. It is learned that BH3 now has enough resources to bail out Pakistan
Oh! My apologies
for missing the mention of “Racing snake” whilst talking about
the marathon. His insane obsession with running easily qualifies him to be the
brand ambassador for such mega-events.
As I walked
closer inside the foyer I sensed a whiff of magic in the air. The mystic
fragrance whispered the presence of an enticing mermaid among us. I took a deep
breath and closed my eyes to allow my instincts to take control. They (my
instincts) playfully finger-held me and led me closer to the scent of my woman.
Then, as I fluttered my eyes open, I found myself in striking distance from
this red-clad deity called Namita. (It turns out to be that this celestial
beauty also happens to be our hostess for the day.)
I commanded my
heart to stop the yoyo act so that I could formulate my approach strategy and
opening line. Girls like men who appear confident, are smooth, composed, and
come direct. So I bit my lower lip and stood like a rock inviting her
attention. After about eleven minutes of patience, I was not only noticed but
greeted by her dazzling smile. Man, that
was it for me!! I felt as though I was tied to 99 red balloons that lifted
and landed me on cloud 9.
“Look I know we’re perfect strangers, but somewhere
deep inside of me there floats a bubble of hope to ask you out”. That opening line sure did assure me a berth next to her at least
for that day. I could exhaust a forest writing about her but……
Coming back to
earth, the post-registration climate was pretty charged. A turnout of 70 + is
proof enough that BH3 means serious business. The chequered flag was struck
by the hares Sita, Rahul, Alka, and the gang at around 10:45 am.
Being a crisp
day in January, there was a slight nip in the air, so no one was complaining
about the weather. The run began with a false trail throwing the momentum
completely off gear. The sight was similar to that of watching scattered ants
confused due to the drops of water that were sprinkled over their sugar bits.
The chalk marks led us through Colaba, Lion’s Gate and the Historic Gateway of
India.
Across the Taj
hotel, we took a break at the Sparkle Aqua stop which was much
needed for the next half of the run.
While we cooled
our heels, there was this eerie couple staring intently at us. A closer look
revealed that they were wearing Hash Ts belonging to Kiwi origin. Naturally, a
dialogue was initiated between us. Not knowing the laws of the BH3 land, Gary “Sir
Cum Navigator (H/O “Corinna
Globetwater”) started off with a polite conversation. “It’s a small world he
remarked!!” “No,” I said, “We’re just
plain unlucky to bump into awful people like you”. Instantly they realized that
BH3 has no room for sugar-coated conversations but decided to be a part of us
neways.
On the other
half of the run, there was a gang of miscreants including Roma and Azmul who
conspired to break the rules and stopped at the fountain Westside store for
some refreshing brew.
Back to the
Oberios, our lube sponsor “Castle” was more than prepared for
diehard guzzlers. Meanwhile, the surrogate battle to woe Namita continued in a
cold fashion. By now I had scored a couple of brownies with her. Among the
contenders were Philthy, Osama, and Shivaji who were fielding in 1st
slip, short leg, and gully position respectively waiting for me to play a loose
shot. Conscious of the fact that women go for older men, the odds weren’t
exactly in my favor. Here’s some juice… did I tell you about Shivaji
and his red kerchief story?? He had lent this cheeky piece of rag but
when she was returning it back to him he asked her to keep it till they met at
the next run. Now I fail to remember the countless Bollywood flicks this stunt
has been repeated – but let me tell ya, buddy!! You gotta be more original.
By this time the
ice had started showing signs of anger for being left out, and as we all know,
the last thing we can afford to do at the hash is mess with it. Naturally, the
czar of the ice, Philthy, was asked to do the honors but for some strange reason, was acting
pricey that day. His excuse that he had a bit too much was rather silly but we
shrugged our shoulders and let him go this time.
The newcomers were as under …
·
Mike who is into oil
exploration-
·
Cris, the US Visa approval
attorney
·
Sunil who is into hair dye
·
Chirag – the DJ at Knight’s
Warf
·
Shela, Sunita, Pranay Vickram
Sally, and many many more …
Visiting hashers were
·
Roma (from Pune) who
trains call girls….. err I mean call center girls.
·
Sir-Cum-Navigator and
Globetwatter from New Zealand
The charges were as under ….
·
Lubna and Rohit for sex
on the run
·
Christopher and
Neelakshi again for sex on the run
·
Roma Azmul Maria and
Lious for eating and shopping during the run.
By now every one of us was mighty hungry
and the spread was too tempting to resist. Not surprisingly, the incorrigible Osama
shamelessly grabbed his plate even before the ceremony ended. So the
precedent was set and the circle had to be dismissed sooner than it actually
should have. The meal arrangement was enough to feed an army. This more or less
marked the end of the day’s play so with sunken hearts we gradually thinned
away.
On On
!!
P.S: Guys I have managed to secure Namita’s e-mail
id. and cell phone #. The going rate is US $ 75 and US $ 125 respectively ( Not
negotiable). The details will be given only after signing a Non-Discloser
Agreement (NDA). Interested parties may
please contact Hash cash
No comments:
Post a Comment